The Secret to Life

Ive been so busy the past couple of weeks that blogging has taken a back seat. That is unacceptable, I know. Im planning on making a shit ton of money off this blog and retiring. (This is my backup plan, of course. My porn career was not nearly as lucrative as Id have liked. Guess you make most of your money off SELLING the tapes, not so much making them and storing them in the basements of your ex-boyfriends moms house..but whatever).

So, im back for a minute and im gonna drop some heavy stuff on ya'll today. Yep, Im gonna tell you all what the Secret to Life is.

Ready for it? Got your pencil handy? You're gonna wanna write this down. It's your friends, folks.

It's not your spouse. They drive you bat shit crazy most of the time and you've sworn to God to stay with them, so you're hands are tied. It's not your kids, they are worse than the spouses ever thought about being. It's like having a house full of insane midgets running around at all times. F that!

It's your FRIENDS! They are the only people in the world who understand you 100% of the time. They don't judge you when you say you want to choke the life out of your husband or sell your children to gypsies. Then know you're mostly joking. My life has taught me that, IF you surround yourself with the right network of people, there is nothing you can't get through. Nothing. It's amazing.

Ive been so busy lately with school and kids and family that i'd stopped appreciating what a great thing I have going with my friends. For ever taking them for granted, I need to be kicked square in the cake hole.

I live in a rectangle, im broke all the time, my sons are underweight sociopaths, and at the end of the day, Im still sleeping soundly on cloud nine. How?, you ask...Because, I have friends who were there for me when I was 16 and got knocked up*. I have friends who supported my decision to quit my job and go back to school to do what I love. I have people who know that even when I gripe about my husband, I still love him and really dont mean that I wish he'd meet a nice girl at work and run away with her. They all understand that Im just blowing off steam and that I love my life. I have friends who understand that after a long week of taking care of kids and going to school, I need to let my hair down. They also understand that 'letting my hair down' means getting hammered, listening to music and not worrying about being the only ones dancing to a crappy band in a hole in the wall bar. They are always on the level with me... Always.

I have people. They have me. It is what makes the world go round. Thank you, Jesus, for Amber, Cory, Melisa, Sandi, Laura, Bonnie, Kristin, AJ, Vanessa, Ariane, and so many others.. I am blessed beyond belief.

*(It's technically not called 'pregnant' if you are under 18, live in AR and the father of the baby could be charged in a court of law. The proper term is, in fact, knocked up.)