Seriously...Who would willingly take a pill that caused intense stomach cramping, horrid b.o., dry mouth, excessive sweating, headaches and heart palpitations? Short answer: Me.
I've put on a few lbs over the last 2 years (20, to be exact, fml) and I really need to get it gone. Bustin ass 24/7 at the gym wasnt cutting it. Some say I must have been doing it wrong but I figured even if I was doing it wrong, surely Id have seen a TINY bit of improvement after 4 months... Nope.
That's why Im moving on to legal crack. (Legal Crack = 'Crack' you can buy at any health food/ fitness center) In addition to taking every vitamin or mineral thought to boost metabolism and energy levels, Im now ingesting what I can only assume is some form of Drain-O twice a day. I can actually feel my liver and kidneys failing, but Im no quitter, folks. I gave the gym it's fair shake, now Im riding this out until Im thin or my heart explodes.
Sad part is, Im not even shooting for some unrealistic # that would leave me looking emaciated and able to slice cheese with my collar bones. Im just trying to get back to a reasonable, 'healthy' weight. (Have I mentioned fml?)
My only other alternative is to hire a midget to literally follow me around and slap the food from my hands. I get that being healthy and thin is a 'lifestyle', but my life consists of fast food on the go, 3 picky kids that wont eat anything green unless it's a booger or some Nickelodeon brand of candy and a husband that eats 24/7 in hopes of gaining a pound. The deck is stacked against me but im determined to see this through.
Hopefully the weight loss wont take long because I dont think my cadiovascular system can handle much more of this. Then again, it's probably no more overworked than the seams of my favorite pair of jeans. :/
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