http://www.hulu.com/watch/248352/hoarders-hannakathy-and-gary
Today we're going to attempt to get through an entire episode of A&E's Hoarders. This particular episode features a three legged goat/chicken enthusiast with a wicked right jab named Hanna, and a fun loving Ohio couple named Kathy and Gary who just can't get enough sweet bunny love.
Hoarders - Hanna/Kathy & Gary
"Compulsive Douchebaggery (two g's?) is a mental disorder marked by an obsessive need to point and laugh and lampoon those who are less fortunate."
"More than 3 million people are compulsive douchebags."
"Here's two of their blogs....."
01:29 We're gonna call bullshit on the "ridgerunning" and "stump-jumpin".....also the last "cotton-picking" was probably done by her grandparent's slaves....guessing she didn't fall too far of the genetic tree when it comes to physical dexterity.
01:30 COCK
01:45 Why is she feeding them handicapped grain.
01:53 Lawanda...Luanda....Lahwunda.....
01:58 Wheelchair'ing feed around a 4 1/2 acre farm?
02:10 "Hey, take off your shoes...this is semi-new dead cat hair"
02:15 "off to the right is our immovable wall of junk....and over here on your left is the guest immovable wall of junk"
02:30 If this house's a rockin MOVE THE FUCK OUT OF THE WAY CAUSE IT'S COMIN DOWN
02:55 sweet freedom. If you look closely you can see scrawled on the tupper ware in chicken scratch "Brooks wuz here"
03:30 "good thing to get out of that ol raggedy......aggedy trailer" See Hanna's still there mentally, she realized this was basic cable.
03:44 We could go the rest of our lives without ever knowing what behiggies (two g's?) are.
04:15 We figured out why the chickens are dying....she feeds them tide.
04:53 Luwanda don't take no shit! She has a tattoo above her udder that says "Goat Life"
05:01 So that's how you get 30inch biceps? Pushing a wheelchair around 4 acres and bitch slapping goats all day.
05:04 Hit pause.....whom does this remind you of? Think "Nah Clark, he's just under the table yakkin on a bone."
05:55 16 kids and 10 are still living......we are speechless. Although it's above 50% so we'll cut her some slack.
06:22 As long as it's in the confines of a 3 by 5 Rubbermaid tote.
06:45 If 6 of my brothers or sisters had died I would've said " I can't stand to see Mom live...."
Kathy & Gary or I GOT TOO MANY BUNNIES
07:05 "I got too many bunnies." Don't worry we're having the t-shirts printed now.
07:05 Gary seems a little nonchalant about having 6 MILLION GODDAMN BUNNIES
07:15 So in the plus column we have "wiggly nose".......
07:28 "They"? Gary? Really? Let's change that to "Gary says"...."Gary says that when bunnies do it....bunnies do it"
07:28 That t-shirt will be for sale as well
07:40 SHOCKER
07:52 This footage looks like the Blair Bunny Project.
08:15 Tomorrow, tomorrow, we'll slowly die of asphyxiation from inhaling bunny shit....tomorrow....it's only a day away.
08:29 The Animal Protective League...which rents a room on the backside of the Justice League.
08:32 My friends call me "Bunny Wrangler" It's not about the money.....WIGGLY NOSES Y'ALL
09:10 We wonder if Jeff had taken the opportunity to be a little punny and tell the landlord that the situation was "hare-y"
09:10 BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
09:12 WANDERING FECES Y'ALL
09:52 Petty larceny....b & e....bunnies....the rapsheet just goes on and on with this guy.
10:02 Pause....we'll give you a minute to go and vomit
10:22 As Gary says " I fought the bunnies and they eventually overpowered me and took over my home"
10:36 "No I'm not."
11:32 At this point we're opening up the over/under on dead bodies in Hanna's house at 6
11:45 NO SMOKING - You can clearly tell the chickens wrote that.
11:52 "...specialize in OCD and Compulsive Hoarding...1,2,3...1,2,3...are you gonna throw that away?"
12:28 If you turn up your speakers really loud you can hear "Welcome to the Jungle Baby.....now you're gonna die...."
13:24 Excuse us but it shouldn't it be "Second time I saw one dead?" Stop hoarding bad English.
14:23 "I don't drink liquid chicken shit often...but when I do, I drink Hanna's liquid chicken shit"
15:56 At this point Cory called Misty on her cell from 2 feet away to turn on the fan.
16:35 At least the rabbits seem to be potty trained
17:10 He has a pretty awesome bunnypult so I'd watch my step back there.
17:25 I got's my bunnies, I got's my bejeweled....I don't need no damn shrink.
18:50 They've not once mentioned her hoarding of eggs!!
19:06 So you're saying that you're surprised that the woman who killed 6 of her own children, beat the other 10 so badly that they were removed from her care isn't showing the emotions you thought she would about people helping clean her house?
19:45 She fights kids, she fights goats, she fights chickens
19:45 Luwanda agrees
20:18 We can't believe people willingly come to clean these homes on Hoarders. We both agree we would have been like "Fuck you Matt....no way, I'm going to work at McDonalds". Working on that crew should be court-ordered.
20:51 She's pregnant cause she couldn't get away from the other goat.
20:52 through 21:45 We have no words
22:31 Seven. Seven times.
23:15 Hanna Badger don't care.....Hanna Badger don't give a shit.
23:45 They should change the side of those trucks to read 1-800-What the fuck?
24:13 That's not ice...it's rabbit shit.
24:55 Dorothy needs to take it down a notch.
25:40 The water's for drinkin....the bleach is for the bunnies.....aim for the eyes.
26:50 Pause....can you spot the irony? Hand soap covered in shit.
27:03 We're both very surprised at how well Todd and Levana are taking this. Makes us wonder how bad THEIR house is?
28:13 There really shouldn't be a question about should they evict Gary and Kathy.....
28:50 Shit is about to go down....and not rabbit shit.
29:00 Or the producer....or the crew....or Steve the camera guy.
30:14 THEY"RE ALL SICK
30:21 Understatement of the Decade
31:23 We are shocked that Hanna's children do not deal well with conflict.
31:29 Wait....who the fuck is Bart?
31:45 "HEY WATCH OUT BART!" T-shirt GOLD
33:21 "We didn't land on Portage County Ohio....Portage County Ohio landed on us" - Bunny X
33:33 Probably from Gary.
34:19 They're using the term "cleaned" loosely
36:25 And we mean sick, this turkey was into some SICK shit....scat porn, beastiality (which to them is just called porn).
37:25 We just put on Sarah McLachlan's "Angel" and had a good cry
38:53 Is Hanna gonna have to choke a bitch?
39:00 Where's Bart when you need him?
40:16 WE PICKED THE BEST HOARDER EVAR YOU GUYS!!!
41:24 We're putting money on them finding out that Gary and Kathy have a kid....or had a kid.
43:17 Nope just funny.
End Credits
Hanna moved on to beating larger animals like mules and cows...She felt the smaller ones no longer offered up much of a challenge
Gary and Kathy moved in with Todd and Levana and started humping like rabbits.
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